Wednesday, August 1, 2012

cougars and ladders and cancer oh my!



you all remember the minnestoa dog whisperer ROBERT COLE from last week. his pit bull and his lab went missing on his fiance's watch and when they returned, the pit was bleeding with a threatening message scribbled on his back. (back off bob) COLE and/or fiance AMBER MARIE WADE concocted an elaborate story about a hate crime being perpetrated against COLE because he is an advocate for pit bulls and we're all such ignorant haters.

well, we can now add hate crime abductions to the overactive imaginations of pit bull con artists.

i was so sad when they cancelled HOUSE, the only tv show that i really enjoyed since the cancellation of LIE TO ME. little did i know that pit nutters could provide so much MORE entertainment value. i laughed so hard after i read the police report that i wore myself out. i hope you enjoy it as much as did. the investigation is complete and it doesn't look good for the cesar wannabe. here are a few highlights from THE POLICE REPORT.

(click on the screenshots to view larger and enjoy!)



THE POLICE REPORT



THE POLICE REPORT



THE POLICE REPORT



THE POLICE REPORT


COLE stated he uses CESAR for this, yet in the police report CESAR is described by both WADE and COLE as timid.

THE POLICE REPORT



THE POLICE REPORT


bob, i don't think jesus will look kindly upon your violation of exodus 20:16.

THE POLICE REPORT



THE POLICE REPORT



THE POLICE REPORT



THE POLICE REPORT

this is my favorite part...


THE POLICE REPORT



THE POLICE REPORT



THE POLICE REPORT



THE POLICE REPORT



THE POLICE REPORT



THE POLICE REPORT



click HERE for the police report.

so, to sum up, fired for what appears to be embezzling, evicted, arrested, outstanding warrant, suspended driver's license, filing a false police report, falsely accusing an innocent man of a heinous crime and moving in with his in-laws with his escape artist pit bull. and he is only 27 years old! i bet the neighborhood is thrilled.


AMBER MARIE WADE, CESAR, ROBERT RANDALL COLE

The medical report stated that "lung, musculoskelatal and degloving most consistent with trauma from hit by car, and/or dragging. Lung changes consistent with trauma, suspect hit by car." Dr. Heather Douglas, of the Douglas Animal Hospital in Osseo

THE POLICE REPORT

CESAR needs your help! in addition to expensive emergency medical care, CESAR needs an owner with an IQ above 85!

THE POLICE REPORT

shouldn't fraud or filing a false police report charges be added to this hate crime? how about soliciting donations for a non-existent "hate crime"?

THE POLICE REPORT

as vintage says, pit whispering/griftering is hard work but somebody has got to do it!

THE POLICE REPORT

shakopee news
the kare 11 report of the 29th stated that the police thought the pit bull was hit by a car. the comments are a scream. overwhelmingly, they believe the original story, parroting what they read when first reported and calling the police lazy and the kare 11 irresponsible for reporting the bogus story, DESPITE THE FACT THAT THEY LINK TO THE ENTIRE POLICE REPORT. LOL, am i the only one who reads anymore?


the "educated" and "responsible" fucktard took a jab at me on facebook and i love it.



THE POLICE REPORT

ROBERT COLE please take your well earned place among the nutter royalty: KRIS CRAWFORD, CINDY MARABITO, AMANDA CONRAD, LEAH PURCELL, ANDREW ROZSA. we have a new champion so move over ladies and take copious notes if you ever expect to compete with BACK OFF BOB & CO.

THE POLICE REPORT

seriously, we need a fucking pageant for the proper recognition of these psychopaths. they earned it.

THE POLICE REPORT

see also
robert cole minnesota dog whisperer

MARS midwest animal rescue services


oh, did i mention that you can download your very own copy of THE POLICE REPORT?

36 comments:

vintage said...

Another Pit Bull net drain on society moment...

How many tax dollars were wasted dedicating a Police Officer to shuttling these unemployable Pit Nutters back and forth, only to have to dissect the lies?

Now the Great Pit Whisperer moves back in with Mommy...Wait til Caesar mauls something and she is stuck with the liability!

You Can't Make This Stuff Up!

Miss Margo said...

Behavior reflects personality. This is a good police report. Good investigation, good write-up. Interesting that ALL the evidence points in the same direction and paints a picture of this guy as being a dishonest common criminal.

This reminds me a bit of...wasn't there a famous scandal that happened in the 80s where this black teenage girl claimed to have been assaulted and wrote stuff on her body to make it look like she'd been attacked? And later it came out that she wasn't attacked at all, she'd done it to herself because she was worried that her abusive parents were going to hurt her because she sneaked out of the house? It was before my time. It was some famous scandal.

Anyway, this Cole guy is a piece of work. I have to admit, there is a part of me that really enjoys it when bald liars get caught and publicly humiliated for telling WHOPPERS.

Your Quiet Neighbor said...

@Miss Margo: You're referring to the Tawana Brawley case.

Miss Margo said...

AH! Thanks YQN--I couldn't remember.

Small Survivors said...

This is a great story! I just wish I could find the police report to read it for myself :)

It was a fascinating read. Among the best parts was how BOB had been educating his neighbors about pit bulls and pit bull owners for months, it seems, by consistently letting his
mutant escape containment and terrorize them.

Also the part about being recently arrested, losing his job and his home. I'm wondering if the arrest had to do with the embezzlement of funds or if he's been up to other shenanigans.

There should be a pageant for BOB and it should lead right to the door of that nutter midwest animal rescue.

Anonymous said...

(Recent reader, first time commenter.)I can't imagine an "animal torturer" being creative enough to intentionally deglove a dog's leg. I wouldn't know how to go about doing that, and I used to be a veterinary assistant. Someone who wanted to harm a dog would, based on cases I saw, kick it or strike it with a bat or board or something similar. Someone who wanted to torture a dog would (and I saw plenty such cases) tie or write the dog's mouth shut before torturing it. Someone who was sick of the animal running loose (near a daycare center!) would surely either have poisoned it or shot it. This dog got HBC.

I saw plenty of HBC dogs that didn't have road rash. (This dog did have a piece of gravel embedded in it, though--how'd that get there?)

This shit makes no sense, and I don't know why people line up to swallow it. The very basics of dog ownership are that you get your dog a rabies shot and license, and that you ensure your dog cannot run loose.

Anonymous said...

Oof, sorry for the typos. The torturer would "wire" the dog's mouth shut, not "write" it.

DubV said...

This is just like clue!

Girlfriend, in the garage, with a marker.

That's my guess.

Rumpelstiltskin said...

DubV

I think CSI should perform a handwriting analysis of the pit bull's back! "BACK OFF BOB!" HAHA!

Silly pit nutters. Another way they cost taxpayers so much grief. All this trouble because they want to dupe the public.

And they want the public to pay for their pit's veterinarian bills. Sure they will collect enough for the bills plus rabies, license, grooming, and fines. The pit nutters and gullible will donate because it's a dog.

Only good thing I can say is it didn't attack anything.

scurrilous amateur blogger said...

i imagine the conversation between cole and wade went something like this:

wade: i'm sorry baby, i got distracted taking photos of myself in the mirror.

cole: damn it amber! i am going to be ruined as a dog trainer and god will turn me away on judgement day.

amber: i'm sorry baby. i'll fix it with this green MAGIC marker, i promise.


i feel sorry for pit bulls. i hate it when that happens. i hate it when fucking pit nutters like rozsa and cole make dog fighters look good! pit bull are stuck with owners not responsible enough to keep them and everything around them safe. and when they fuck up big time and their pit is hemorrhaging, they write on his body to try and cover up their own incompetence and then drive him to a much farther vet. and then the fucking freak show of cyber nutters refuses to believe this was anything other than the work of a hater and the cops are lazy and the journalists are unethical. fuck!

scurrilous amateur blogger said...

new reader, yeah, hardly anything makes sense in nutter world. here's something no one asked, IF some pit hater stole the pit to harm it and scare BOB, why did they take the lab? wouldn't a true hater either leave the lab behind or not return it? wouldn't a true hater be afraid to steal the pit?

as for how they all line up to swallow the lies, you will find that science, facts and hard evidence do not exist in nutter world. it's all rainbows and unicorns in their little bubble, with nothing but hateful ignorant nazi haters on the outside of the bubble harshing their mellow and causing pit bulls do to evil.

you want to see more of their nuttery? read this and this

scurrilous amateur blogger said...

miss margo, yep, i really despise liars. especially when they trash the police and legitimate journalism. it's funny that the pit nutters are calling me a liar over this! but i haven't heard a peep since i posted the link to the police report though.

Anonymous said...

@Dawn, when I say "new reader," I mean "one who recently discovered this blog and read the whole thing over a weekend." I've now seen more nuttery than I can stand...but it still makes no sense.

I'll eventually find a way to use an actual username for commenting purposes, sorry.

DubV said...

"the fucking freak show of cyber nutters refuses to believe this was anything other than the work of a hater"

yep, cult mentality and also most people cannot fathom that other people see things they don't (this is why the gullible always make absurd attempts to fool the less gullible, they assume everyone is as oblivious to reality and easily persuaded as themselves).

Anonymous said...

(Oh hey, there it is. Never mind.)

DubV said...

Whenever a pit bull commits violence, the nutters claim it could've been any breed as all can be violent. Whenever a violence is committed on a pit bull, the nutter claim it was done specifically because it was a pit bull.

Anonymous said...

http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/3qbbhd/

DubV said...

So, coyotecrowe, it seems you've witnessed that a weiner dog killing a baby once in recorded history passes for an airtight argument?

scurrilous amateur blogger said...

hey coyotecrow, yeah i though that's what you meant. but wow, the whole blog in a weekend! that's impressive. did you sleep at all?

i love your meme. if you make more, please post them here. i have played around with that too. here is chris hansen cat.

Anonymous said...

I may have exaggerated a little (-: but I read pretty fast. Also, this was several weeks ago, so I didn't read everything in one weekend, just the backlog. I think I originally got here via the America's Dog blog, but I can't remember how I found it--perhaps via Skeptifem?

Anonymous said...

@DubV, whaaaaat? I'm not sure, but I suspect I've been misunderstood.

Anonymous said...

@DubV, Wait, I misunderstood your snark, right? Sorry: new. Derp!

Anonymous said...

Just one more then...

http://memegenerator.net/instance/24281671

safer midwifery utah said...

how much money has he gotten from this story by now?

scurrilous amateur blogger said...

excellent question skeptifem!


according to this link, So far, Midwest Animal Rescue and Services has raised about $5,000 for Cesar's care.

DubV said...

Yep, just being sarcastic. I liked the meme.

scorched earth said...

They have a long way to go to equal the cash collected for faux service dog Mimi....

vintage said...

Meanwhile, over in North Carolina..

DNA Test links Pit Bull "DMX" to dead victim

http://www.wral.com/news/local/story/11375665/

US PITICIDE 339

Dude, I BaggedYourPit said...

Look at the expenditure of public resources to investigate this whack-job's bull shit and fraud. The best possible ending for this story is for this guy to be charged with false reporting/obstruction and fraud by deception.

Jake said...

Vintage isn't that #340? Wasn't there a guy killed by his ambull a few weeks back? Not sure why it hasn't shown up on fatalpitbullattacks.com.

vintage said...

Jake,

There was also an man killed out in AZ a month ago...still waiting on investigative results.

For now, the AmpuBulls are not listed on Fatalpitbull attacks.com

Rumpelstiltskin said...

Little off topic but I had to share this from Yahoo Answers.

Looks like someone got duped, LOL!

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AnFhf4nA8rWJGOLbTYFJmLYjzKIX;_ylv=3?qid=20120731073638AAvVgwf

I recently adopted an Amstaff mix from the animal rescue facility.?

"I have never owned an Amstaff mix before, and recently found out they are related to Pit bulls, which I was avoiding ever adopting."

Miss Margo said...

DubV, your avatar reminds me of Hannibal Lector.

Your Quiet Neighbor said...

@Dude said:

Look at the expenditure of public resources to investigate this whack-job's bull shit and fraud. The best possible ending for this story is for this guy to be charged with false reporting/obstruction and fraud by deception.

To which I say:

Include a requirement to pay restitution in the charges. After all, those public resources don't come cheap.

Anonymous said...

id like to meet god and jesus christ and pamela anderson too, just the once , with protection of course.

vintage said...

Clearly, "BACK OFF BOB-GATE" is one of the Top stunt pitting backfires in history.

Need to update and add to this...

TOP STUNT PIT MOMENTS IN HISTORY


**Disclaimer...You Can't Make This Stuff Up!